A lot of articles are devoted to the culture of nutrition, how to eat right is not written except on the iron, and psychologists have probably already revealed all the psychological causes of excess weight and eating disorders.
Body positivists have introduced fullness into the category of almost a cult, forgetting that the original idea of body positivity was to accept your appearance, all its aspects, not just weight, and not to promote obesity as beauty. Because if you are fat, yes, it is better to accept yourself, hatred does not help you live, but acceptance does not mean that you do not need to lose weight and that being overweight does not affect the health of the body.
However, we forget that eating habits, like many other things, are formed in childhood. And, unfortunately, we see a lot of overweight children around. Of course, there is a small chance that they will outgrow their fullness, stretching dramatically in adolescence. But more often than not, overweight children grow up into full adults.
And they are full not because they eat their psychological problems, but because in childhood they were fed by their fathers and mothers. And now it is much more difficult for them to restructure the nutrition system in order to balance the weight.
How Parents Shape Eating Disorders
Recently, at one of the psychological forums, a mother anxiously and indignantly asked psychologists: “My daughter is 8 years old, she is fat, but I can’t limit her food, she still eats, what should I do and what should I do?”
Mom was asked a lot of clarifying questions, and as a result, it turned out that for dinner the child eats, for example, mashed potatoes with a cutlet. And he knows how to cook vermicelli and fry eggs on his own. In addition, the child still eats with his grandmother, the diet is about the same. The difference is that in this whole food collapse, a mother, driven by guilt, can cook a salad for her daughter. And the grandmother does not cook, because she does not feel guilty.
An educator with great experience shared with me how she fed a child who did not want to eat. More precisely, he did not want to eat anything useful from her point of view. She clamped the child’s hands behind her back, pushed the spoon into the screaming mouth, and then pressed the throat so that the food passed.
Now the child eats well and independently everything that is given to him, and the educator presents this as a case of his victory of good over evil – healthy eating over unhealthy – and the greatest merit.
How will these children grow up? The girl who eats what she finds at home (while her mother expects her to regulate her own food at the age of 8), and the girl who was raped with food?
Family matter
The formation of eating habits and food culture is laid in the family. I am not a supporter of extremes and some deliberate efforts. It is clear that vegetarian parents will feed the child in the same way, and parents who love meat, sausages, and cheeses will instill this taste in the child. And each of these children will form a normal healthy taste, it will just be different.
But let’s apply a few simple and reasonable rules:
The child eats what he finds in the refrigerator or on the stove. If you have there solid buns, cheesecakes, purees, fried, spicy and fatty, because you love it so much, and instead of a lunch box you give him money to go to school, which he will spend on straws and waffles, it is clear that the child will have problems with weight, and in general with the state of the gastrointestinal tract.
The whole family probably has the same problems. But unlike you, a child is not an adult, he cannot make a choice of food, therefore it is the choice of parents – either the whole family should reconsider their eating habits, or give the world another fat and sick person.
What do we teach our children to cook? What are their first courses? Vermicelli and scrambled eggs? Because our mother taught us this, as her mother taught her, and we automatically pass this experience on? But grandmothers knew the hunger and crampedness of communal kitchens, mothers considered a piece of bread and butter as a cake in childhood, and we grew up on potatoes, pasta, and buckwheat because there was no other assortment in stores.
Now everything has changed, in stores, you can find products from all over the world, and cooking a salad is faster and safer than boiling vermicelli in terms of time and procedure, so why do we still teach our children how to cook vermicelli?
“Forcing someone to eat, like forcing someone to do something against their will, is violence. Will you say that the child does not yet have an understanding of what is good, what is bad? Yes, it’s true, but the task of a parent is to help to gain this understanding, to help distinguish one’s own desires and needs, and not to use force to impose one’s desires and understandings.
“Feeding is not the way to love!” Express love, for example, through words or quality time with your child. I understand that even from starving grandmothers we learned just such a principle of conveying love – “the main thing is to eat well,” and a chubby child of 6 years old, crushing pies, cutlets, and homemade pickles for both rosy cheeks, looks very cute.
An appetizingly eating child is the same mi-mi-mi, like a sleeping one. Only 10 years later, the same mother and grandmother, who “fell in love” with food, drag him to hospitals. And all doctors as one say: “First you need to lose weight.”
The opinion of nutritionists
Now let’s hear what nutritionists have to say.
One of the most burning topics is how to form the right eating habits in a child. How many times a day should a child eat? Should the child be forced to eat? Child and sweets – to give or limit?
The right habits and relationships with food are laid in utero, so it is important for the expectant mother to monitor the quality and quantity of food during pregnancy, as well as during breastfeeding.
If we are talking about school-age children, then they have already formed eating habits, but it is still possible to influence them, and the sooner we start our work, the easier it is to correct eating behavior.
Optimal for a school-age child – 3 main meals (proteins, fats, carbohydrates) and 1-2 snacks. In between meals, there should be no “intercepts”, especially sweet, starchy foods (fast carbohydrates). About 3 times a day, a child needs to receive complete proteins (eggs, cottage cheese, fish, lean meat, dairy products) for the growth and formation of the body.
All our cells are made up of proteins, and therefore the lack of protein structures can lead to a slowdown in the growth and development of a child. You also need to pay attention to vegetables and fruits. Most often, problems arise with vegetables. Children are not accustomed to eating fresh vegetables. The maximum that a child gets is vegetables from soup or borscht. This tactic leads to the fact that the child receives less valuable fiber and many nutrients. It is a fiber that is responsible for the “purity” of our intestines. All body systems suffer from improper bowel function and untimely emptying. Absorption of nutrients decreases. This leads to vitamin and mineral deficiencies. Therefore, it is extremely important to accustom a child from early childhood to vegetables and fruits. And focus on vegetables. Explain, buy and cook them together with the child.
Now about sugar addiction. Almost all children have a sweet tooth. There are a number of physiological and psychological reasons for this. Comforting a child with food is the biggest mistake parents make. Fell – sweetie: this tactic leads not only to health problems but also to the formation of addiction later in an adult. It is very difficult for such people to find the strength to solve problems without the help of food.
As for the physiological reasons, adults themselves form cravings for sweets in children from an early age. From their position, they perceive food without sugar as tasteless, they add various kinds of sweeteners (alternatives to sugar, since they read a lot about the dangers of refined sugar). Forgetting that the taste buds of children perfectly perceive natural, fresh, juicy fruits in the form of sweets. And fruit is a really worthy replacement for artificial sugars. If a child gets fruit for dessert, cravings for buns and chocolates decrease. The child may not refuse them at all, but he will perceive them differently. The secret of this is in the work of our brain, which receives a sweet taste, and it does not matter from what source the body gets it.
And finally – the most difficult topic. Should the child be forced to eat? My experience is that this is not worth doing. Our organisms, and even more so the organisms of children, regulate all systems of vital activity to such an extent that it is almost impossible for a child to remain hungry of his own free will. Another question is if the child “intercepts” fast carbohydrates (crackers, straws, sweets, rolls) all the time and clogs the natural functioning of his systems.
Complete meals suffer, nutritional deficiencies appear. Parents have the feeling that the child has not eaten anything, as they forget about ice cream on the street, a bun in the pool, etc. There is a conflict over food with all the ensuing consequences. And the solution to the problem is very simple. Eliminate unnecessary snacks. Make 3 main meals and 1-2 snacks on demand (fruit, fermented milk product, rennet cheese, vegetable cuts, etc.).
What foods should not be given to children? In order for children to be healthy, it is important to change the principles of nutrition of the family itself and exclude from the diet those foods that are harmful to our health in general. Children, like sponges, absorb everything they see, and parents are an example for them.
Pay attention to the products that are in the house. Remove fatty foods from the family diet, foods with a lot of substitutes and dyes, unnatural, artificial. This food causes obesity, allergic reactions destroy our health, and acts as a drug on our body.
Such products include chewy sweets, marshmallows in bright packages, “Chupa Chups”, chips, sweet carbonated drinks, chocolate bars, sausages, mayonnaise, ketchup, instant noodles, numerous instant soups, mashed potatoes, powdered drinks, and many others. This list is growing every day and when buying products in the store, be sure to look at the label.
Minimize the consumption of processed food and give preference to unprocessed natural products, then the child’s body will receive energy for life. Avoid buying food of dubious freshness and bypass unscrupulous manufacturers. The human body is very smart, and only natural food is needed for its nutrition, and this is inherent in us by nature. Before putting food on a plate for yourself or your child, think carefully about what you want to get as a result. The choice is yours!
